The midwest is like a smelly wet dog June 16, 2007

Monday, May 21, 2007

I’m a big fan of the demotivational posters; they’re a cynical spoof of the motivational posters which you’ll see around many offices in the DC area. My office has Demotivations. One of my favorites is a larger than life picture of french fries. The headliner reads, “Potential,” and the caption underneath says, “Not everyone gets to be an astronaut when they grow up.” After years of cyclic overachievement, subsequent burnout , and then re-focusing, many of the people I went to high school with have gone on to do impressive things and hold job titles that require a professional linguist to decipher. Some people are less impressive, yet know how to spin well enough to seem so. I’m one of those. I love my job and I’m passionate about what I do, but even though I own a t-shirt that proclaims, “I’m kind of a big deal,” in the grand scheme of things I’m really not. That said, I find it enlightening when I have the opportunity to speak with someone who is completely down-to-earth and honest about their lack of achievement. I had such an opportunity while I was back in the homeland last week thanks, in part, to the blog. Allow me to set the scene… I’ve mentioned my blog to a few people, and I have links to it on a couple of other sites. I like the attention and I aim to entertain. A few months ago someone who I had a vague association with in high school contacted me to give me props for my writing. “I wanted you to know that I have gotten the occasional kick from reading your notes/blog entries, specifically the ones about dating. You’re very jaded. It’s quite amusing. Just thought I’d let you know.” Never one to pass up a compliment, I responded.  “I wouldn’t necessarily say I’m jaded, just realistic. I tell it like it is and make no apologies. Bet you’re glad that we never went out now, huh?” Well, now we have, and now I get to write the requisite blog. Oddly enough, I told him I wouldn’t, but he requested it. Finally, someone who’s more of an attention-whore than I am. So… it’s difficult to blog about something when you care. One of the novelties about my blog, one of the reasons that I’m able to be so bluntly honest, is that I only write about things that don’t really matter to me. When it matters, when it’s personal, it’s off-limits. That being said, I don’t want you to get the wrong impression. Even as I chick, there’s only so much you can read into this particular situation – ie: not much. And, so, since I don’t want you to think I’m making it too personal, and since the circumstances and the resulting impression left deem it bloggable, I’ll honor the request. (I hope you have some money on whether I would do this or not). I was stuck in Illinois for a little over a week, a chance to get away from the 24/7 rush of DC and to get some much-needed face time in with the fam. I was bored after the first day. While there, due to the wonders of Facebook and its amazing stalking capabilities (which, I will admit, I’ve taken advantage of over the years), I ended up meeting up with this guy from back in the day. The last time I saw him was at reunion last year. I didn’t recognize him then because he looked quite a bit different – ie: better – than he did in high school. (Amazing what puberty and a little weight-loss will do – I would know.) So, six years and several drinks later… No. That’s not what went down.* We talked. We talked more during a lunch we had together one day than we talked during the three years we went to school together. He’s not an astronaut. After graduating from an impressive university with an impressive degree, he’s living back home with his folks. In other times, in other circumstances, there would be a lot of condescension to be read into that. None now – it happens to the best of us. All bets aside, there’s potential, and that’s what counts. That being said, though, sanding decks and playing online poker is not what you want to put on your resume to reflect the past year’s efforts. As attention-grabbing as a business card reading “Professional Player” would be, it doesn’t quite send the right message. While hanging out with him, I had the opportunity to visit some of the fine drinking establishments in Springfield. You know you’re back in the Midwest when the beverage of choice can be sipped out of a bucket. Classy. Very rarely have I visited the area bars and I certainly haven’t missed much. That being said, it’s better than sitting at home and I’m glad I had the opportunity. I know that some people love the small town atmosphere. For them, there’s nothing better than drinking out of a bucket or being proud of the fact that they can name all of the past 4 seasons’ American Idol top ten contestants. One of my good friends who also happens to be living at home right now just emailed me and said how great it’s been. Yes, it can be good – don’t get me wrong – but my opinion is that it’s too easy to get sucked into staying within a zone of comfort. The Midwest is like a smelly wet dog. It’s friendly and fun sometimes, but if you get too close it’ll take you by surprise, jump on you and start humping your leg, and before you know it you’re left with a lingering scent and you need to put on new pants. Okay, maybe that analogy doesn’t quite work. My point is that people like the Midwest and the small-town feel, but as comfortable as it might be at times it’s difficult to leave and get rid of the permeating scent of monotony and apathy if you stay too long. That’s why I love DC. The only thing that you can count on here is that nothing stays the same. There’s always something different to do and something new to see. But this isn’t about me or my life in DC (for once). Back to the point. I feel there’s an inverse correlation between the length of my posts and their entertainment value. I need to wrap this up in a thoughtful, yet hilarious, way… (Note: This is totally only going to make sense to people who went to IMSA) So… I had a wonderful time back at home this past week, in part due to this particular person from back in the day. I’m sure you’re wondering if I’m going to name names. As tempting as I am to lie and make you piss your pants by telling you it was someone like Yogesh, I can’t bring myself to do it. Just the thought of anyone having anything happen with that guy is enough to make me cringe. Ew. As with most things, I like to tease. I’ll leave you to guess. Happy birthday. *There’s more that happened, but that my friends, is personal.

Wearing plaid to a party is never a good idea June 16, 2007

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Wearing plaid to a party is never a good idea What do we want? Ice cream! When do we want it? Now! How’re we going to get it? Umm… Yeah… apparently Ben & Jerry’s free cone day is today. Unfortunately, the closest shop is in Georgetown. You can punch me in the face and call me Sally if you think I’m going set foot in that part of town without a better incentive than that. Seriously, I’m not a fan of the area. There’s nothing inherently wrong with it (other than the fact that it’s full of pretentious yuppies who think they’re better than everybody else) and nothing traumatizing happened to me there (other than being blinded by the sight of multiple men in pink polos with popped collars on multiple occasions). I just don’t like the place. Honestly, I’ve never had anything good come from my infrequent forays there and the overall impression I get of the people gives me all the more reason to argue for mass sterilization. No one who wears leggings over a baggy hippie shirt with sunglasses that look like they could devour their face should be allowed to procreate. I know it may be in fashion, but there’s a big difference between having fashion and having style. Fashion is when you pay $100+ for the latest trend just so that you can flash your name-brand, ugly-ass bauble around and proclaim your yuppie entitlement to the world. Style, on the other hand, is a bit different. Style is when you can take your Target-boutique jewelry, pair it with a hand-me-dwon dress that used to belong to your friend, and show up to a party with more class than anyone else.  In the words of my friend, Johnny, whose party I had the pleasure of attending this weekend, “Who is this guy wearing a plaid shirt at my cocktail party?” That guy obviously had neither style, nor fashion. Maybe he was from my hometown. Don’t worry. I’m not trying to hate on the good people of the midwest. I don’t hate, I stimulate.  Plaid shirts aside, there are several important points you should take away from this blogging: - Georgetown sucks. I don’t care how much free ice cream they have – I’m not going. - Plaid is never a good idea, no matter where in the country you live. - Leggings are also never a good idea unless you’re me at age 8 and you don’t know any better. - People should throw more parties and invite me because, as we all know, I am awesome. (btw – I’m throwing one of my own either the last weekend of May or the first weekend of June, so mark your calendars)

Crack for the soul June 16, 2007

Monday, March 19, 2007

The future of science is in dire straights. It’s sad. I helped to judge the Arlington Regional Science Fair this weekend. If the projects I saw were any indication of the current state of science education, then America could possibly be overtaken by an army of of French people (b/c we all know that the French are stupid). Better yet, we could be taken over by an army of French who work for Macy’s (if you don’t get the reference, then you need to read the backlog). How humiliating would that be? They would win the science fair and look stylish, at the same time as overtaking the country. Case in point: one project asked the question, “Does fertilizer help plants grow?” Their results were unsurprising, to say the least. Really? Fertilizer helps plants? Wow, and your great grandfather’s second cousin’s ex-boyfriend knew Einstein? Must be genetic – a conclusion that someone working at Macy’s would infer. That’s not to say that some of the projects weren’t decent. It just surprised me that a few of them made it all the way to the Regional section. But hey, at least they had time to practice saying “Would you like fries with that?” as they waited for for their “honorable mention” sticker. In totally unrelated news… I had a great weekend. Saturday was a very un- St. Patrick’s day. No green beer was consumed. No flashing green clovers worn on various articles of clothing. That’s not to say that good times weren’t had; they most definitely were. One observation: I need to turn my phone off on nights when drunken texts and voicemails from friends are unavoidable. As much as I do enjoy them, sometimes there are other matters to attend to. I went to IKEA on Sunday. I was up in Maryland for brunch and it was on my way back. That store is like crack. No other place could convince me that I not only want, but desperately need $200 worth of crap that will sit in my apartment and collect dust. Would I like a box of wine glasses for $2.99? Nevermind the fact that the only time I drink is when I’m out with people. Sure. How about a new bathmat for $7.99? I already have two, but for that price, how could I not? New sheets? No one wants to sleep on bedding that’s so old it should have come with its own blacklight and bleach pen - most definitely time for a new set.  They sell everything there. I think I saw a shelf labeled “Crap - 0.99.” It was empty. I even saw a woman breastfeeding on one of the couches in the furniture department. Nothing says, “Buy this couch” like breast milk stains. Way to be progressive. Now, my apartment looks like an advertisement; I’m considering taking photos and sending them into the catalog dept. to see if I they’ll publish them. I should at least get a free plastic bag for my efforts. (If you haven’t heard, they’ve started charging for them.) That’s right. I deserve it. Hey, maybe they’ll even give me my soul back if I take a picture of the receipt that I’ve put in my new barely pronouncible Finlir frame. Good times.

That’s just how I roll with it June 16, 2007

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

It’s 82 degrees out. I’m sitting in my office blogging. I’m wearing sunglasses because I’m cool like that. The sun is pouring through my window as I listen to Third Eye Blind on the radio and prop my feet up on my desk. If someone in the apartments across the street had binoculars they could probably see up my skirt right about now. I don’t care because that’s just how I roll with it. Life is sweet. I can taste it in my spit. Or maybe that’s just because I finally gave in and had ColdStone for lunch today. Either way…     I may have found a new roomie. Sure, it means I will no longer be able to walk around the apartment in various states of undress. It also means that I won’t have anymore blogging fodder about the psycho for your entertainment. But if it means not having to put up with her OCD tendencies and random bitchery, then it’s worth it.   I’m already planning the party for when she leaves. We’re going to make paper plate decorations and hang them all around. There won’t be any talking during the party. Instead, everyone will be issued their own Post-It notepad and we’ll all write messages to each other. Each and every note must end with a large exclamation point, regardless of whether or not it’s needed. If you break the no-talking rule you’ll be yelled at and compared to a crack whore. We’ll be playing games. One is called the “I work for Macy’s” spelling game. To win, you just have to have an IQ greater than that of a houseplant or a small rock. We’ll also be playing the passive-aggressive game in which you’ll see just how much you can piss someone off without doing anything directly to them. One example would be taking the last hors devour before your friend has even had one and then later mentioning (on the Post-It, of course) how delicious the food was. Another example would be stealing their chair when they’re not looking and then putting it back later when they don’t need it anymore. We’ll even have special hand towels in the bathroom. The red ones will be for douching only. Any other suggestions? It’s gonna be kickass!   Kickball season is coming up. I registered. Wouldn’t miss it for the world. My team’s playing in the DC Federal league this time. It’s on the other side of the Mall. This is good. It mean two less metro stops on the way there and also a brand new bar in which to puke. Good times ahead. I would highly recommend it. Kicking balls and taking names – that’s what WAKA’s all about.   My computer at home is having difficulties. It’s on the rag I think. Smacking it around didn’t help and neither did yelling. It decided to just breakdown one day last week and only comes back when I promise to buy it nice things. I’m going to invest some time this weekend to try to sweet talk it a little more.   Still gymming. I make faces at myself in the mirror when I do the weights. It’s not intentional. I didn’t even really notice that I was doing it until the other day when I saw someone else making faces in the mirror. Their arms were about the thickness of dowel rods or the wide end of a pool cue. They were trying to do lats with lift a 50 lb dumbbell in each hand. I stifled a chuckle, brandishing my 20 lb. set, secure in my wuss status. “At least I can do that without looking that stupid,” I thought. So I proceeded with my lats (Where you stand straight arms at your side with weights in hand, and slowly lift them from your side, keeping your arms straight, until they’re at shoulder-height… Jesus pose) and glanced at my face while I was doing them. Definitely made uncontrollable weird faces. It was somewhere in between a grimace and a look of intense concentration. Reminded me of the way my roomie looks when I use words that are too big for her to understand.   Enough for now. I’ve got to get back to saving the world. Peace out, my people.

No tiny gay men for you June 16, 2007

Monday, February 26, 2007

More drama than Anna Nicole More crazy stories than the National Enquirer And more eagerly anticipated than Britney Spears’ next faux pas in life (poor girl)… No, I’m not talking about your mom. I’m talking about my return to blogging. I know, I know. I was gone for awhile, but now I’m back. Over a week in SF and then another week to catch up with everything. Unfortunately, keeping up with the ol’ myspace ranks right up there with watering the fake plants and combing out the fringe on the rug – just not at the top of my list at the moment. So sorry to deprive you. But, since I now have been hit with a whopping case of insomnia and I’ve already done everything I can think of short of any actual physical activity to try to tire myself, a-blogging a shall do. So, San-Francisco. Where do I begin. Needless to say, it was wonderful. The last night of the trip I hit up the PunchLine comedy club. Pretty well-known place and now I know why. Their people are more hilarious than watching George Bush try to say something intelligible. Here’s a joke that I totally stole from one of the guys: “Hey, good to be here. Thanks. Yeah… so my birthday was last week and my roomie gave me a really gay gift. (long pause)  Yeah… it was a blowjob. You know, that’s not really my thing. I’m not gay. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I just don’t swing that wat. But, ya know, now that I think about it – it was the perfect present. It’s one that I’m sure to NEVER regift.” Much better told in real life. Hilarity, and oh-so-appropriate for SF. No, while I was in the city I did not eat any rice, nor did I confiscate any cute gay guys to come back and be my personal stylist (as if I need any help). I did however, do some amazing things: 1) I went on a helicopter ride for the first time ever. It was amazing. We flew out over the city, the bay, Sausalito, etc. for over 45 min. Absolutely breath-taking scenery and it was beautiful weather. The pilot even swooped down under the Golden Gate Bridge. Talk about amazing. Photos on Snapfish coming soon. 2) I jogged from Chinatown down to the Wharf one morning (easier going down than coming back up – whew!). The streets were pracitcally deserted because everything was closed so early in the morning. It was breathtaking. That same day, I walked to the Fine Arts Palace which is further down by the bridge. I  got there and was literally sitting on a bench in shorts and a t-shirt sunning myself in February. Doesn’t get any better than that. 3) Did the tour cruise thing. Fed some seagulls from the back of the boat and one almost bit my hand off. I’m a wuss, so no rabid birds for me – after that I was done. My dad (who came out to visit while I was there),  still fed them though and I got some cool pics. 4) I saw a necklace that was selling for over a million dollars in one of the stores down by Union Station. The necklace that I ended up getting was only $89. Not quite as glamorous, but I like it. It’s made from 2,000 yr-old Roman glass. Neat-o 5) Being in SF, I missed the huge winter storm back in DC. All the more reason to love it there. 6) Oh… and the conference. Yeah – I almost forgot that I was there for work. The conference was really good. I went to a lot of workshops, did a lot of networking, and even judged the AAAS poster competition. The catering was amazing, as were some of the research projects I heard about. It was one of the best work-related experiences I’ve ever had and I think I got a lot out of it. All-in-all it was a damn good excuse to go to SF. 7) And the most unbelievable thing ever – I didn’t miss a flight and none were delayed long enough to screw up my schedule. How awesome is that?! Yes, much much more that I haven’t mentioned, but it will have to wait ’til some other time. Lots of drama upon my return. Seriously, things just fall apart when I’m not around, huh? No worries. Most of the drama revolves around other people than myself. Some just like to make things seem like a bigger deal than they actually are. I mean, c’mon – paper plates?  (A story for another time) And facebook trashing? Who does that? I won’t even go into some of the other things that have been popping up, but I can guarentee that I will have none of it. I stick with my girl, Missy, on this one and proudly proclaim, “No more drama.” Peace out, my people.

Synergy, this is your brain on drugs June 16, 2007

Friday, January 19, 2007

I think I’ve mentioned before how great my job is, how much I love it, and how I couldn’t imagine working anyplace else and being happier. This is all true. It is wonderful…mostly. But, I’d rather be forced to juggle flaming balls of poo than have another day like the one I had yesterday. A few highlights, for your entertainment: - Since I was stuck in panel all day, with no hope of escape for an entire 10+ hours, I decided to peruse the ol’ internet during the less enrapturing parts of the discussion (ie: the 9+ hours of dicussion on cyberinfrastructure). I was situated at the conference table in between two visiting scientists, reading some bloggings from my contemporaries, when all of a sudden my laptop screen fills with porno shots. WTF. I gasp quietly (but loudly enough to draw the attention of the two I’m sandwiched in between), and quickly close out the window. I’m not sure if they saw what was on it or not, but it made me a lot more cautious of reading my favorite bloggers for the rest of the day. But hey… look at it this way – at least I didn’t accidentally click on meatspin like I did that one time. - Since I was in panel all day, the only food available was pastries and fruit. In a vain attempt to exercise self-control, I vowed that I would only eat the fruit. Three plates of fruit later… my digestive tract was not agreeing with my decision. Next time I’m going with the friggin’ danish. - As soon as panel was over for the day, I rush to my office to sign out and get the hell out of Dodge. I think, if I hear one more person utter the words, “collaboration, synergy, or cyberinfrastructure,” I won’t be responsible for the terrible burns they’ll surely get from my laser stare. I get all the way to my desk, only to find that my computer has, once again, decided to take a vacation and completely konked out on me. Same problems as before, only this time every single person in the division has left to go home, leaving me to curse as loud as I want. At least I get an extra 15 min. of comp time by booting up the seretary’s unit and logging out through her system.   Lots more where that came from, but I’m not in the mood to bitch about it all day.

what I’m doing with my day off June 16, 2007

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

An unexpected day off… Things I’ve already done or plan to do before the day is out: - Clean – I know… but today is the day of unexpected things - Dance around (semi) naked in my apartment to the new Killers album relishing the fact that the roomie’s still on vacation - Work out like Nicole Richie on crack (wait, she is…) I dunno what else to write about. I’m kinda bored…I had a weird dream the other night that Dave Chapelle stole $20 from me in front of a flower store. Weird… Anyways, this week’s going to be awesome. More to come later…

highlights from the homeland June 16, 2007

After a long absence of an entire five months, I decided to grace the midwest with my presence yet once again. Like the appearance of a chocolate cake at a diabetic clinic, my trip back home was sweet, but over before it really got a chance to be savored. As promised… a few highlights of my eventful return to the homeland.

-I had some serious airport karma going on with my friend, Emily Rose. We both ended up on flights out of the same terminal in the same airport. AND… both of our flights were delayed to the same time. It was great to be able to pass the time with someone as awesome as myself. The return trip wasn’t so lucky, but at least I was able to go down the list on my phone and catch up on all the holiday gossip.

- My mother refrained from uttering her signature holiday catchphrase. For as long as I can remember, at some point or another she has declared, “Merry F-ing Christmas!” This year, as I waited for the shit to hit the fan, the air was unexpectedly clear with only a slight tinge of bickering. It was a merry x-mas indeed.

- I’ll be the first to admit that I’m materialistic. I’m also a bit of a braggart. But instead of listing all the wonderful things I received for Christmas this year, I’ll just say that I got everything I asked for and then some. On top of the xmas day bounty, my folks each took me out shopping for some post-holiday sales. If Illinois is good for anything, it’s defintiely gotta be the inexpensive yet aluringly wonderful apparel and accessories. Look for some new digs to go with my new do.

-Speaking of a new do, I did indeed make a change. You can check out the new pic, if you like. Shorter and lighter.

- I learned how to play poker a little better under the tutelage of  my uncles on Christmas Eve. I can definitely put the new skills to good use. Although, I expect I’ll be betting something more than poker chips if I end up playing around here.

- As I mentioned, I raked it in this holiday. However, the only thing my brother gave me was what he liked to refer to as Christmas pinches. They’re exactly what they sound like. Ouch.

-Met up with a few peeps from the old crew in Chambana on a quick jaunt one day. Though nothing’s really changed there, everything’s different… in a good way. I purposefully avoided a few people/places, but overall it was a wonderfully nostalgic trip back. And, yes. For those of you wondering, there are still a lot of hoes frequenting White-Ho, and Green Street only continues to get better.

- I spent a few days in St. Louis towards the end of the trip. There’s nothing like ice skating in Forest Park during the holidays. It felt like something out of a movie. Me in my new red coat and green scarf, gliding to the sounds of caroling over the sound system. It reaffirmed my love for that city. I also met up with some people from high school while in the city. Good times. Good times, indeed.

So… to wrap it up. It was wonderful to return home and be greeted with such warmth and rejoice. At the same time, the highlights are pretty much what I did when I wasn’t sitting around bored out of my mind in front of the tv. There’s only so much Jerry Springer and Price is Right you can watch without wanting to hurl the remote through the screen and get your lazy ass off the couch. It was somewhat depressing to realize that life used to be like that… for way too long. Makes me all the more grateful now of where I’m out now.  I hope everyone else had a great vacation!

The birthday weekend… of death June 16, 2007

Monday, December 11, 2006

Ha – not really. I just put that title in there to make you want to read it. Surprise, surprise. I survived my birthday weekend ski trip… and I have only a few bruises and a ton of great memories (and pics) to show for it. There was more skiing than falling, more powder on the slopes than up Kate Moss’s nose, and definitely more good times on this annual reminder that I’m one year closer to old than there has been in a long, long while. I’m not going to give you a minute-by-minute account of the festivities, at the risk of making it seem less awesome than it actually was. Because, really - who wants to hear about one of my friend’s ridiculously foul ass emanations or the rousing game of three-letter word Scrabble? I will, however, give you a play-by-play of a few highlights of the weekend: 1) I learned how to ski. Despite falling on my ass quite a few times, somehow getting snow up my back despite the layers of clothes and ski pants/jacket, plowing into some people at the bottom of the slope (why do they make that bottom slope the steepest part if you’re supposed to be slowing down?), and by the end of the day feeling like someone had beat my body with a stick bigger than the one stuck up the roomie’s ass, I had an amazing time. Seriously. It was absolutely exhilarating. Better than rollerblading, even, because falling on snow hurts a lot less than the gravel. I think for a first timer, I did pretty well. Who’s up for seconds? 2) I thoroughly enjoyed the company. My three favorite people from DC were there to share in the fun and we definitely made the most of it. Honestly, there’s nothing like modeling swimsuits when you’re drunk, hot-tubbing outside in the winter, or roadtripping with no worries to make for a fabulous weekend. It wouldn’t have been the same without any of them and I only hope that everyone had as wonderful a time as I did. 3) Not leaving until the late afternoon. Since when am I one to throw in the towel early? No way. Check-out may have been at 11, but we didn’t leave until after 3. Though the pool was a little too public (is that even possible?) for afternoon escapades, it was still a lot of fun  The weather outside was too beautiful to pass up a chance for a few photos, and the drive back afforded me the opportunity to jam out to my tunes without the usual accompanying embarrassment (I am definitely not the next American Idol). A great weekend… And I couldn’t end this without giving a shoutout to the people who made it all possible – you guys are great! Kevin – Thanks for pulling it together and making the dream a reality. It wouldn’t have been able to happen without you, and you’ve totally repaid me for the RedSkins puke-fest. I owe you one. Em  – You are always so much fun to be around! I love having someone around who I can be totally uninhibited with and joke and laugh about everything. I’m sooo glad you were able to come. We may not be the best at the winter sports, but we can look good trying. Scott – Have I told you how wonderful you are? Yeah…you are. You definitely made my birthday weekend one of the best, in more ways than one. And, I love the fact that you didn’t criticize my driving, skiing, or singing skills (because I know they all leave a lot to be desired). I’d like to say a few other things, but I’ll save that for a more appropriate venue. Thank-you, thank-you, thank-you to everybody for making it such a great time!

Turkey, like your mom – best served stuffed June 16, 2007

Friday, November 24, 2006

I have to admit, this sounds bad… My first Thanksgiving away from the fam was, by far, the best Thanksgiving I’ve ever had. From the minute I woke up in the morning to collapsing in bed at night after the day’s fesitivies, there’s not much more that could have made the day any better. Some highlights from the the big T-day: - Being woken up the best way there is. - Kevin’s pineapple upside-down cake. It’s like an orgy in your mouth, and everyone’s coming. - My shitty corn casserole dish. No one got sick, which is always a plus. It actually wasn’t that bad, but it would have been much better served warm. I swear, I really am a good cook. - Listening to Ray sing the banana song. Not quite as bad as Randy Travis, but it was better than my uncles’ rendition, I’m sure. - Not having any Cheez -Its - Playing Taboo and not sucking – or at least not as bad as some people - Being able to be around good people and having a great time. A big thanks to all who made the day so wonderful. I do believe this will become a new tradition.